More and more frequently we are hearing stories of Somali pirates capturing another commercial ship somewhere in the Gulf of Aden. My mind immediately conjures up an old galleon, complete with the Jolly Roger hoisted high, and Captain Jack Sparrow or Blackbeard waving their unsheathed sword at the helpless victims.
Apparently, my Hollywood-shaped view of piracy and the truth are worlds apart. Today most of the pirates are not just scallywags in search of adventure and riches; they are often the destitute in search of basic survival needs. There are thousands of men left homeless, country less and desperate by years of oppression and tribal conflicts in the desert countries in the Horn of Africa. They are easy prey for the warlords and bandits who have decimated their country and are willing to do anything to make a living – even piracy.
This past year there have been over 70 pirate attacks off the coast of Somalia and there are currently 17 ships in Somali ports awaiting ransom payments. The Saudi tanker, Sirius, containing over one hundred million dollars worth of crude oil is being ransomed for a paltry $25 million. (They were recently paid $3 million). As crude oil prices continue to plummet the oil companies are losing money by the second. Most of the ransom money is used to purchase more weapons and seaworthy vessels to expand the buccaneer business, as well as provide money for the pirates and their families. It is a rather bizarre approach to making ends meet, by a group of men who are desperate and have nothing else to lose.
I often wondered how a ragtag group of modern day pirates could capture a monster supertanker. Pulling alongside in a ‘pirate tanker’ and swinging from the dozens of ropes, like they do in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, is not how it is done, apparently. The pirates often are afloat in the shipping routes on an old trawler and appear to be harmless and unthreatening. As a potential victim tanker or cruise ship approaches, the pirates use a number of speedboats to race to the larger vessel and with ropes and hooks manage to board. The pirates are heavily armed and most cargo and passenger ships are basically unarmed. A small group of determined and armed warriors can easily intimidate and capture a larger vessel with ease.
It doesn’t seem right somehow that today’s pirate vessels possess no skull and crossbones, no one legged captain with a parrot on his shoulder and no plank to walk. Who would have ever guessed that high seas piracy would be a growth industry in the early 21st Century?
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
My Unique Solution to the Gaza Conflict!
As soon as President Obama has comfortably assumed office, I am going to forward to him my plan to help resolve the Gaza Strip conflict. Most solutions of complex political and religious conflicts are very intricate. My first step solution is really quite simple.
I have recently become aware that the Gaza Strip and the island of New Providence in the Bahamas, where we currently live, are about the same size. Both parcels of land are about 20 miles by 7 miles. The Gaza population is about 1.5 million and the Bahamas population is about 200 thousand.
I propose that for a year the two populations be exchanged. The idea of population swaps occurred in the 1920s between the Turks and the Greeks and a similar swap would be the first step towards a Middle East peace.
It is almost impossible to resolve the existing Israeli Palestinian conflict when both parties are living in such close quarters. The sporadic rocket assaults from Gaza into Israel and the subsequent retaliation cannot occur if one of the parties is not home. The year the Gazans are on their Caribbean sojourn will provide a time for calm, stability and for Israeli reflection on the present situation.
The Palestinians, who are a very industrious and focused people, will enjoy the life style of the islands. They will be surrounded by warm tropical water, and enjoy a mild and sun filled climate without the presence of walls, checkpoints and the fear of Israeli bombs or air strikes. They will have a chance to experience a peaceful lifestyle and develop new farming and fishing industries to provide for their people.
The Bahamians will probably be in for quite a shock waking up in Gaza. They will be forced to live in a war torn country that is walled in and surrounded by Israelis. While this may appear to be harsh and unjust, it may just be the kind of motivation the Bahamians need to wake up and smell the coffee. They have probably taken their laid back, easy, island life style for granted and will find that most of the world’s people need to be productive and contribute to the development of their own economy. They will no longer just be able to sit back and feed off tourist dollars because there are none in Gaza.
Without a doubt the exchange of countries has the potential for some very positive changes in the lives of all concerned. After a year, both Bahamians and Gazans will have the option of returning to their homelands. Perhaps enough of the Palestinians may chose to remain in the Bahamas and say to hell with fighting with the Israelis. You never know!
I am sure President Obama will be inviting me to join his administration after he hears of my First Step Middle East Peace Proposal. I have dozens of other wonderful creative solutions to world issues that I know he would love to hear!
I have recently become aware that the Gaza Strip and the island of New Providence in the Bahamas, where we currently live, are about the same size. Both parcels of land are about 20 miles by 7 miles. The Gaza population is about 1.5 million and the Bahamas population is about 200 thousand.
I propose that for a year the two populations be exchanged. The idea of population swaps occurred in the 1920s between the Turks and the Greeks and a similar swap would be the first step towards a Middle East peace.
It is almost impossible to resolve the existing Israeli Palestinian conflict when both parties are living in such close quarters. The sporadic rocket assaults from Gaza into Israel and the subsequent retaliation cannot occur if one of the parties is not home. The year the Gazans are on their Caribbean sojourn will provide a time for calm, stability and for Israeli reflection on the present situation.
The Palestinians, who are a very industrious and focused people, will enjoy the life style of the islands. They will be surrounded by warm tropical water, and enjoy a mild and sun filled climate without the presence of walls, checkpoints and the fear of Israeli bombs or air strikes. They will have a chance to experience a peaceful lifestyle and develop new farming and fishing industries to provide for their people.
The Bahamians will probably be in for quite a shock waking up in Gaza. They will be forced to live in a war torn country that is walled in and surrounded by Israelis. While this may appear to be harsh and unjust, it may just be the kind of motivation the Bahamians need to wake up and smell the coffee. They have probably taken their laid back, easy, island life style for granted and will find that most of the world’s people need to be productive and contribute to the development of their own economy. They will no longer just be able to sit back and feed off tourist dollars because there are none in Gaza.
Without a doubt the exchange of countries has the potential for some very positive changes in the lives of all concerned. After a year, both Bahamians and Gazans will have the option of returning to their homelands. Perhaps enough of the Palestinians may chose to remain in the Bahamas and say to hell with fighting with the Israelis. You never know!
I am sure President Obama will be inviting me to join his administration after he hears of my First Step Middle East Peace Proposal. I have dozens of other wonderful creative solutions to world issues that I know he would love to hear!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Ken Makes Samuel L Jackson's Day
This weekend I worked the Michael Jordan Celebrity Golf Tournament again. I was pestered continually by the celebrities and only after agreeing to have my photo taken with some of them, would they back off. Movie Star Samuel L Jackson was the most persistent so I finally relented and let him have his picture taken with me.
Friday, January 23, 2009
A Million Dollar Man is a Bargain!
Steve Austin, TV's original million-dollar man, would be an incredible bargain by today’s standards. He was employed in the military and designed to protect and safeguard our country. Steve was worth every cent! The really important question today is, “Is Carsten Charles Sabathia worth $161 million over seven year, for just throwing a baseball for the New York Yankees?"
CC Sabathia, the six foot seven, three hundred pound monster baseball pitcher signed recently for $161 million. That translates to a little over half a million dollars a pound or two million dollars a vertical inch! And he doesn’t have a bionic arm or an X-ray eye! How is he going to help keep us safe and secure from potential terrorist attacks?
Sabathia will basically receive $23 million a year over the contract. Last year, he won 17 games, pitched 253 innings and struck out 251 batters. If you would like to be able to share useless information with friends, these statistics, if he duplicated them this year, translate as follows: he would earn $1.35 million for each win, or $91 thousand for each inning pitched, or $91 thousand for each batter he struck out. Starting in April 2009, if he pitched nine innings and won the game, while striking out ten batters, his contribution to this team would be valued at 2 million dollars for just that one-day’s “work”!
Many would be critical of a ball player being paid these astronomical sums of money. The reality, however, is it is not the player's fault to accept a $161 million offer; it is the misguided business sense of a baseball club owner to make the preposterous offer. You can’t blame Sabathia for accepting the money. After all, he is a growing lad and has a family, including three children, to support. He is just fortunate to possess a talent that few others in the world possess – even though his skills will not help with homeland security issues like Steve Austin’s did.
One of the curious sidelights of this deal was the last minute negotiations, which added an extra one million to an earlier $160 million offer. The highest paid pitcher in history had been Johan Santana whose contract calls for $22.9 million a year. If Sabathia had signed for only $160 million his average salary would have only been $22.85 million. The addition of the extra one million dollars raised Sabathia’s average salary to $23 million a year. Even with a totally outrageous salary package, it was important to the ego of Sabathia or the marketing managers of the Yankees, to be able to say that Sabathia’s salary is the highest of any pitcher in baseball. Let’s just hope that he earns it – if that is humanly possible!
PS. I think that the New York Yankees would have been wise to pay for my consulting services. If the Yankees had offered CC $160,020,000 instead of $161 million, his average salary would have been $23.86 million and still elevated him to the highest price pitcher ever. They would have saved $980,000 and I am sure been happy to offer me at least a $100,000 bonus for my mathematical prowess.
CC Sabathia, the six foot seven, three hundred pound monster baseball pitcher signed recently for $161 million. That translates to a little over half a million dollars a pound or two million dollars a vertical inch! And he doesn’t have a bionic arm or an X-ray eye! How is he going to help keep us safe and secure from potential terrorist attacks?
Sabathia will basically receive $23 million a year over the contract. Last year, he won 17 games, pitched 253 innings and struck out 251 batters. If you would like to be able to share useless information with friends, these statistics, if he duplicated them this year, translate as follows: he would earn $1.35 million for each win, or $91 thousand for each inning pitched, or $91 thousand for each batter he struck out. Starting in April 2009, if he pitched nine innings and won the game, while striking out ten batters, his contribution to this team would be valued at 2 million dollars for just that one-day’s “work”!
Many would be critical of a ball player being paid these astronomical sums of money. The reality, however, is it is not the player's fault to accept a $161 million offer; it is the misguided business sense of a baseball club owner to make the preposterous offer. You can’t blame Sabathia for accepting the money. After all, he is a growing lad and has a family, including three children, to support. He is just fortunate to possess a talent that few others in the world possess – even though his skills will not help with homeland security issues like Steve Austin’s did.
One of the curious sidelights of this deal was the last minute negotiations, which added an extra one million to an earlier $160 million offer. The highest paid pitcher in history had been Johan Santana whose contract calls for $22.9 million a year. If Sabathia had signed for only $160 million his average salary would have only been $22.85 million. The addition of the extra one million dollars raised Sabathia’s average salary to $23 million a year. Even with a totally outrageous salary package, it was important to the ego of Sabathia or the marketing managers of the Yankees, to be able to say that Sabathia’s salary is the highest of any pitcher in baseball. Let’s just hope that he earns it – if that is humanly possible!
PS. I think that the New York Yankees would have been wise to pay for my consulting services. If the Yankees had offered CC $160,020,000 instead of $161 million, his average salary would have been $23.86 million and still elevated him to the highest price pitcher ever. They would have saved $980,000 and I am sure been happy to offer me at least a $100,000 bonus for my mathematical prowess.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
My Most Memorable Meals of 2008
Lord knows I am not a gourmet or a food aficionado! A local columnist recently highlighted her five top restaurant dishes from last year so I thought that I would try to identify mine as well.
I will use her choices as a kind of standard of excellence, for after all, she is a restaurant reviewer. Her first selection was Ossobuco alla Milanese – a slow braised veal shank, served with saffron risotto. She salivated over a meal of Bonito Panko-crusted Spider Crab Cake atop a bed of edamame mash and raved about Wahoo Tataki with Sasabi Sauce, sunny-side up quail eggs, chives and crispy shallots. Her final two selections were, Black Cod Alaskan Sablefish with Saikyo Miso maple glaze and Lionfish Tempura with Voodoo Sauce.
As exotic as her selections sounded, they did little to stimulate my salivary glands. I sometimes wonder if people rave about some food because of its unusual name, the weird combination of toppings or the probably exorbitant prices. I don’t think I would have ordered any of the above dishes if I had not read her review. I am not sure I would order any of them even after having read her selections. I am basically a simple meat and potatoes kind of guy, I guess.
Unlike the gourmet selections above, many of my favorite meals of 2008 were home made meals. If you want to watch me drool spontaneously on my shirt, just mention that we are going to have sauerkraut and spareribs. Of course it would have to be promoted as an Eastern European Hunter’s Stew of prime Danish pork riblets accompanied by a savory fermented cabbage vinaigrette soup! Either way I would need a bib!
Anything grilled over a wood fire would make my favorite meal list. A steak, pork chop, hamburger or even a wiener that is flash cooked over white-hot wooden coals cannot be beaten. The flavor and juices are sealed into the meat and could be promoted as Naturally Braised and Seared with a Hint of Cedar and Sunshine, if you need to get fancy.
Black Angus Ground Meat Spheres with extruded pasta in a delicate tomato, basil, onion, and garlic sauce, also known as Spaghetti and Meat Balls, is always a favorite of mine. Or Clam Linguini or Kraft Dinner.
Just as our expert reviewer chose several fish dishes, I also love seafood. I am always more than satisfied with a piece of grilled salmon, a lightly battered white fish, pan-fried trout or a tin of sardines smothered in ketchup. My tastes are not as fancy as sablefish, lionfish, or spider crab, but I find all seafood meals are good meals.
So there you have it – my favorite meals of 2008 – sauerkraut, grilled meat, pasta and fish. Come to think of it I am sure that is the same list I would have used in 2007, in 2006, in 2005… No Voodoo Sauce or quail eggs for me!
Now it’s your turn!
I will use her choices as a kind of standard of excellence, for after all, she is a restaurant reviewer. Her first selection was Ossobuco alla Milanese – a slow braised veal shank, served with saffron risotto. She salivated over a meal of Bonito Panko-crusted Spider Crab Cake atop a bed of edamame mash and raved about Wahoo Tataki with Sasabi Sauce, sunny-side up quail eggs, chives and crispy shallots. Her final two selections were, Black Cod Alaskan Sablefish with Saikyo Miso maple glaze and Lionfish Tempura with Voodoo Sauce.
As exotic as her selections sounded, they did little to stimulate my salivary glands. I sometimes wonder if people rave about some food because of its unusual name, the weird combination of toppings or the probably exorbitant prices. I don’t think I would have ordered any of the above dishes if I had not read her review. I am not sure I would order any of them even after having read her selections. I am basically a simple meat and potatoes kind of guy, I guess.
Unlike the gourmet selections above, many of my favorite meals of 2008 were home made meals. If you want to watch me drool spontaneously on my shirt, just mention that we are going to have sauerkraut and spareribs. Of course it would have to be promoted as an Eastern European Hunter’s Stew of prime Danish pork riblets accompanied by a savory fermented cabbage vinaigrette soup! Either way I would need a bib!
Anything grilled over a wood fire would make my favorite meal list. A steak, pork chop, hamburger or even a wiener that is flash cooked over white-hot wooden coals cannot be beaten. The flavor and juices are sealed into the meat and could be promoted as Naturally Braised and Seared with a Hint of Cedar and Sunshine, if you need to get fancy.
Black Angus Ground Meat Spheres with extruded pasta in a delicate tomato, basil, onion, and garlic sauce, also known as Spaghetti and Meat Balls, is always a favorite of mine. Or Clam Linguini or Kraft Dinner.
Just as our expert reviewer chose several fish dishes, I also love seafood. I am always more than satisfied with a piece of grilled salmon, a lightly battered white fish, pan-fried trout or a tin of sardines smothered in ketchup. My tastes are not as fancy as sablefish, lionfish, or spider crab, but I find all seafood meals are good meals.
So there you have it – my favorite meals of 2008 – sauerkraut, grilled meat, pasta and fish. Come to think of it I am sure that is the same list I would have used in 2007, in 2006, in 2005… No Voodoo Sauce or quail eggs for me!
Now it’s your turn!
Monday, January 19, 2009
Boy Oh Boy, Obama!
I am starting to really worry about Barack Obama. As he begins his career as the 44th President of the United States, I can hardly imagine what must be going through his mind!
As we all know, Obama was born into a mixed race family, at times living in Kansas, Hawaii and Indonesia. He was not a privileged child and worked his way through law school, into the US Senate and managed to be chosen as the president of the most powerful country in the world. I can’t imagine he ever dreamed of this extraordinary development and he can’t possibly fathom the immensity of the job to which he has been elected.
I believe that Barack Obama is a very intelligent, honest man possessing integrity and high moral character. But he is just a man. He is a man elected to a political office. He is a man chosen to provide leadership during a very difficult economic and political time. I need not expound on the many global problems and challenges he is going to have to face. I just keep reflecting on the fact that he is not a super hero or a god sent from Olympus: he is just a common man with human skills and abilities.
The world at large, however, does not view Obama as just a man or just another US President. On many fronts he is seen as a Savior or a Messiah. He has been crowned with the lofty expectations of the black community, the poor, other foreign countries and his own political party, to perform heroic and even miraculous works. No president or world leader in history has ever had the hopes and dreams of so many diverse people riding on their shoulders.
Barack Obama has been anointed, by public opinion and expectation, as ‘The One’ to lead the United States and ultimately the world out of the most troubled time in history. He is expected to solve the world’s economic plight, resolve conflict and fighting in the Middle East, stabilize and resurrect the American dream, and deal with a few miscellaneous chores in the areas of health, education, technology and the environment.
Barack Obama is just a man. He will work hard on many fronts and have to deal with all of the major issues of the day. He will succeed to varying degrees in some areas and fail at others. In the end, however, how can we ever expect him to live up to the massive expectations that have been heaped upon his plate? No man can possibly respond adequately and effectively to all of the challenges and hopes of so many.
Will his successes outnumber his failures? How will he deal with new situations and pressures that have not yet emerged? Can he maintain his calm demeanor, his common sense and his work ethic and still devote time to himself and his family? Like I said, I worry about him. I pray for his success and good health, the welfare of his wife and children and am very thankful he did have the audacity to hope! He is truly a MAN with a mission. Good luck Barack!
As we all know, Obama was born into a mixed race family, at times living in Kansas, Hawaii and Indonesia. He was not a privileged child and worked his way through law school, into the US Senate and managed to be chosen as the president of the most powerful country in the world. I can’t imagine he ever dreamed of this extraordinary development and he can’t possibly fathom the immensity of the job to which he has been elected.
I believe that Barack Obama is a very intelligent, honest man possessing integrity and high moral character. But he is just a man. He is a man elected to a political office. He is a man chosen to provide leadership during a very difficult economic and political time. I need not expound on the many global problems and challenges he is going to have to face. I just keep reflecting on the fact that he is not a super hero or a god sent from Olympus: he is just a common man with human skills and abilities.
The world at large, however, does not view Obama as just a man or just another US President. On many fronts he is seen as a Savior or a Messiah. He has been crowned with the lofty expectations of the black community, the poor, other foreign countries and his own political party, to perform heroic and even miraculous works. No president or world leader in history has ever had the hopes and dreams of so many diverse people riding on their shoulders.
Barack Obama has been anointed, by public opinion and expectation, as ‘The One’ to lead the United States and ultimately the world out of the most troubled time in history. He is expected to solve the world’s economic plight, resolve conflict and fighting in the Middle East, stabilize and resurrect the American dream, and deal with a few miscellaneous chores in the areas of health, education, technology and the environment.
Barack Obama is just a man. He will work hard on many fronts and have to deal with all of the major issues of the day. He will succeed to varying degrees in some areas and fail at others. In the end, however, how can we ever expect him to live up to the massive expectations that have been heaped upon his plate? No man can possibly respond adequately and effectively to all of the challenges and hopes of so many.
Will his successes outnumber his failures? How will he deal with new situations and pressures that have not yet emerged? Can he maintain his calm demeanor, his common sense and his work ethic and still devote time to himself and his family? Like I said, I worry about him. I pray for his success and good health, the welfare of his wife and children and am very thankful he did have the audacity to hope! He is truly a MAN with a mission. Good luck Barack!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
More of Life’s Amazing Rules!
There are several rules that life teaches us over the course of time that should never be ignored. For example, don’t drink and drive, don’t wash whites and colors together, and don’t leave the toilet seat up. Today, I am adding another rule to the list: don’t use the express checkout lane in the grocery store.
The Express Checkout is a devious ploy, instituted by management, to lull the unsuspecting customer into believing that fast service is really possible. It may work if there is no one in the line ahead of you, but if there are one or two people ahead of you – go to the new cashier-in-training line. I believe the “X” in “express” is a clue that we have ignored for too long. Generally, an “X” in this situation indicates that the intelligence of the clerk is an unknown, or her signature since she can not write her own name or symbolic for the location of a lost treasure- her brain
Today I only had three items and foolishly thought that the two people ahead of me would proceed very quickly through the line with their two or three items. Wrong!
The first lady bought two bananas and a beef roast. Her bill was $9.11, which should have tipped me off to the impending disaster. She asked the checkout cherub if she may have made a mistake as she thought the roast cost under five dollars. The clerk informed her that the roasts on sale were in the next bin to the one from which she had selected her roast. The disgruntled lady said she would exchange it and ambled at the speed of a three-legged cat slowly to the far back reaches of the store. During the TEN minutes she was selecting a new roast, the clerk said she could not help the next customer because she had already ‘punched in the bananas’. Such mega financial transactions are not to be trifled with.
The second lady was eventually served while I slowly smoldered and cursed my stupidity at being seduced by the “ less than ten items” sign above the checkout desk. Finally the customer was told that her purchases totaled $21.94. I could read no ominous circumstances into her number and was starting to relax. Until she took out her checkbook!
How many people still pay for groceries with a check? Probably only one, and she stood between me and my escape. Of course, she was very careful in filling out the check and passing a parcel of ID to the cherub. The clerk- with-no-name held the check up to the light as though she were a member of the World Bank counterfeit squad and appeared to give it her nod of approval. But a cherubic nod would not suffice. She needed an initial from her supervisor as the amount exceeded her five-dollar check approval limit.
The supervisor, as you might suspect, was not without some basic management skills. She fully realized that if she were visible or accessible, she would be bothered continually by her stable of protégés for just such time consuming actions as initializing checks. She was eventually located, I believe at the Starbucks nearby, and returned to her post to carefully determine the $21.94 check was indeed good. Her secret method of making this determination, with just the naked eye, is one of the skills that separated her from the cherubic clerk and elevated her to management status.
Needless to say, it took over twenty minutes to finally proceed through the EXPRESS lane and exit the store. I am a sadder but wiser man and am more than pleased to share this life lesson with you. Don’t use the Express Checkout EVER!
The Express Checkout is a devious ploy, instituted by management, to lull the unsuspecting customer into believing that fast service is really possible. It may work if there is no one in the line ahead of you, but if there are one or two people ahead of you – go to the new cashier-in-training line. I believe the “X” in “express” is a clue that we have ignored for too long. Generally, an “X” in this situation indicates that the intelligence of the clerk is an unknown, or her signature since she can not write her own name or symbolic for the location of a lost treasure- her brain
Today I only had three items and foolishly thought that the two people ahead of me would proceed very quickly through the line with their two or three items. Wrong!
The first lady bought two bananas and a beef roast. Her bill was $9.11, which should have tipped me off to the impending disaster. She asked the checkout cherub if she may have made a mistake as she thought the roast cost under five dollars. The clerk informed her that the roasts on sale were in the next bin to the one from which she had selected her roast. The disgruntled lady said she would exchange it and ambled at the speed of a three-legged cat slowly to the far back reaches of the store. During the TEN minutes she was selecting a new roast, the clerk said she could not help the next customer because she had already ‘punched in the bananas’. Such mega financial transactions are not to be trifled with.
The second lady was eventually served while I slowly smoldered and cursed my stupidity at being seduced by the “ less than ten items” sign above the checkout desk. Finally the customer was told that her purchases totaled $21.94. I could read no ominous circumstances into her number and was starting to relax. Until she took out her checkbook!
How many people still pay for groceries with a check? Probably only one, and she stood between me and my escape. Of course, she was very careful in filling out the check and passing a parcel of ID to the cherub. The clerk- with-no-name held the check up to the light as though she were a member of the World Bank counterfeit squad and appeared to give it her nod of approval. But a cherubic nod would not suffice. She needed an initial from her supervisor as the amount exceeded her five-dollar check approval limit.
The supervisor, as you might suspect, was not without some basic management skills. She fully realized that if she were visible or accessible, she would be bothered continually by her stable of protégés for just such time consuming actions as initializing checks. She was eventually located, I believe at the Starbucks nearby, and returned to her post to carefully determine the $21.94 check was indeed good. Her secret method of making this determination, with just the naked eye, is one of the skills that separated her from the cherubic clerk and elevated her to management status.
Needless to say, it took over twenty minutes to finally proceed through the EXPRESS lane and exit the store. I am a sadder but wiser man and am more than pleased to share this life lesson with you. Don’t use the Express Checkout EVER!
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
What Is a Likable Serial Killer?
While patiently waiting "on hold" for my local Internet provider's support desk to help me with an Internet problem, I was listening to their sales pitch to promote their various cable TV packages. One of their advertisements floored me! I don't recall the exact words, but basically they were suggesting that I purchase a package that would allow me to "Watch the program, Dexter- a program about America's favorite serial killer. He makes killing fun."
I had heard of the Dexter show from other sources but had no idea what the show was about. A quick search led me to find out that "Dexter is a likable Miami Police Department forensic expert who moonlights as a serial killer of criminals, who he believes have escaped justice.” I am deeply comforted that the killer is likable!
I do not consider myself prudish nor a religious zealot by any means, but it blows my mind that a television show based upon glamorizing the exploits of a serial killer is now entering its third season. I understand that the show is billed as black humor with a very dark operational premise, but is it necessary that it exist at all? When a vigilante, psychopath is the “hero” of a popular television show I begin to question the intelligence of our species. We like to think and believe that we are intelligent, responsible, educated and caring people with some honorable and lofty values and ideals. How would you explain to a questioning twelve year old how or why this man, who kills people out of some self-righteous conviction that he, must punish evil, isn’t a bad person?
I am sure that many will consider that I am making much ado about nothing. After all, it is only a TV show and we all know that it is just designed for entertainment. They may be right, but I can assure you that those who view and enjoy this kind of show as harmless entertainment need to seriously question some of their own personal values and beliefs.
And by the way, I won’t be subscribing to the cable company’s invitation to buy any of their entertainment packages!
I had heard of the Dexter show from other sources but had no idea what the show was about. A quick search led me to find out that "Dexter is a likable Miami Police Department forensic expert who moonlights as a serial killer of criminals, who he believes have escaped justice.” I am deeply comforted that the killer is likable!
I do not consider myself prudish nor a religious zealot by any means, but it blows my mind that a television show based upon glamorizing the exploits of a serial killer is now entering its third season. I understand that the show is billed as black humor with a very dark operational premise, but is it necessary that it exist at all? When a vigilante, psychopath is the “hero” of a popular television show I begin to question the intelligence of our species. We like to think and believe that we are intelligent, responsible, educated and caring people with some honorable and lofty values and ideals. How would you explain to a questioning twelve year old how or why this man, who kills people out of some self-righteous conviction that he, must punish evil, isn’t a bad person?
I am sure that many will consider that I am making much ado about nothing. After all, it is only a TV show and we all know that it is just designed for entertainment. They may be right, but I can assure you that those who view and enjoy this kind of show as harmless entertainment need to seriously question some of their own personal values and beliefs.
And by the way, I won’t be subscribing to the cable company’s invitation to buy any of their entertainment packages!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Fearless Predictions for 2009
In January, the northern states that border on Canada will all experience long periods of snow and below average temperatures. The population of the southern states bordering Mexico will swell with thousands of Rio Grande swimmers explaining they have been inspired by Michael Phelps when questioned by border patrol agents.
On February 2, the groundhog will see its shadow and as a result the northern states could expect six more weeks of snow and cold and the southern states could expect six more weeks of wet Mexicans.
Clint Eastwood will win the Academy Award for his role as the grumpy old man in Grand Torino. In his acceptance speech he will announce that he is trying not to be typecast and will next appear with Sarah Palin in the movie, Ma and Pa Kettle Go To Fairbanks.
The Obamas will set Washington society on its ear by introducing a number of new events like pajama parties, popcorn and licorice movie nights, and wiener roasts on the White House lawn, instead of state dinners and formal balls, so their girls can participate.
George W Bush will begin construction of his Memorial Library and Museum near Crawford, Texas. To date he has gathered his first grade notebooks, his Hardy Boy collection and the primary story book he was reading when informed of the Trade Centre bombings on 9/11. A focal point of his museum will be the Mission Accomplished banner and his Photoshop enhancements of the Iraqi WMD sites.
Despite having spent $432 million on Sabathia, Burnett and Teixeira the New York Yankees will NOT win the 2009 World Series. In a fit of frustration, the Steinbrenners will trade the entire Yankee roster to the Nippon Ham Fighters (believe it or not, this is a real professional team) of the Japanese league. In return, they receive the exclusive North America franchise rights to Yakamoto Sushi!
The Big Three Automobile makers will unveil their restructuring plan. It will primarily consist of removing the current models from production and introducing the Chevy Accord, the Ford Sentra and the Chrysler Corolla. They will appear remarkably familiar to buyers, but the Big Three will simple point out that the hood ornaments, name plates and trunk labels have all been made in the US by US workers and the rest of the car just “resembles” the original Japanese models.
The development of solar, wind and thermal technology, as alternative energy sources, will drive the price of oil to an all time low of ten cents a barrel. At the same time, however, sunshine will cost $33 a minute, wind will cost $44 a gust and thermal heat will cost each family their first borne child. Ethanol will no longer be produced as a bio-fuel, but used to mix with orange juice like it was meant to in the first place.
On February 2, the groundhog will see its shadow and as a result the northern states could expect six more weeks of snow and cold and the southern states could expect six more weeks of wet Mexicans.
Clint Eastwood will win the Academy Award for his role as the grumpy old man in Grand Torino. In his acceptance speech he will announce that he is trying not to be typecast and will next appear with Sarah Palin in the movie, Ma and Pa Kettle Go To Fairbanks.
The Obamas will set Washington society on its ear by introducing a number of new events like pajama parties, popcorn and licorice movie nights, and wiener roasts on the White House lawn, instead of state dinners and formal balls, so their girls can participate.
George W Bush will begin construction of his Memorial Library and Museum near Crawford, Texas. To date he has gathered his first grade notebooks, his Hardy Boy collection and the primary story book he was reading when informed of the Trade Centre bombings on 9/11. A focal point of his museum will be the Mission Accomplished banner and his Photoshop enhancements of the Iraqi WMD sites.
Despite having spent $432 million on Sabathia, Burnett and Teixeira the New York Yankees will NOT win the 2009 World Series. In a fit of frustration, the Steinbrenners will trade the entire Yankee roster to the Nippon Ham Fighters (believe it or not, this is a real professional team) of the Japanese league. In return, they receive the exclusive North America franchise rights to Yakamoto Sushi!
The Big Three Automobile makers will unveil their restructuring plan. It will primarily consist of removing the current models from production and introducing the Chevy Accord, the Ford Sentra and the Chrysler Corolla. They will appear remarkably familiar to buyers, but the Big Three will simple point out that the hood ornaments, name plates and trunk labels have all been made in the US by US workers and the rest of the car just “resembles” the original Japanese models.
The development of solar, wind and thermal technology, as alternative energy sources, will drive the price of oil to an all time low of ten cents a barrel. At the same time, however, sunshine will cost $33 a minute, wind will cost $44 a gust and thermal heat will cost each family their first borne child. Ethanol will no longer be produced as a bio-fuel, but used to mix with orange juice like it was meant to in the first place.
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